This was supposed to primarily be a beauty and lifestyle Substack newsletter (all the things the model recommends!) but so far, five posts in, I haven’t touched upon anything even remotely beauty-related or lifestyle-themed. I’ve covered off the matter of massive dogs in cafés, I’ve written about humiliating naked night terrors and I’ve even carried out an inconclusive non-scientific study on the powers of Kombucha.
I think Ursula the Sea Witch from The Little Mermaid is a shoo-in for a perfume tie-in too (I'm thinking some sort of enormous tuberose number, like being battered to death with a bouquet containing all the expensive flowers from the florist). Also, Ursula is in charge, she has no time for whingers and she has a plan. If I did Disney bounding (I do not, but the idea is beguiling), she'd be my choice (sweetheart neckline, heavy makeup: bring it on).
Disney Villains are definitely more interesting than the heroes (what? Another prince? Or princess? Yawn).
An entertaining blog as always Ruth. As a mere stripling many moons ago, I started off with pure Patchouli oil, which always left a grubby oily mark on my neck. I still go for perfumes that have that as a base note, but both the 'oudy' JM and the Gucci perfumes sound gorgeous. I'm intrigued by the 'flappy hoop' for some unexplainable reason 🤔.
I must simply go out and buy it now! Gucci should employ you but I’d rather you this minute sit down and write a bonk buster!! This term has been missing from all the Summer Reading Lists and I want it back!! And you are the woman to do it. Also perhaps I but I’m sloth like in my Summer Laziness
I love your writing Ruth - can't wait for the book and now want to get the audio book too for the reaI Ruth experience ha ha!
I spent my 20's (mid 80's - mid 90's) doused in Body Shop Patchouli oil and I still yearn to find something that matches up - I'd happily wear it 'raw' (?!) again (not to everyone's - by which I mean almost anyone's taste, I know!) but still search for anything with a hint of it. I got a vintage 70's shagpile rug years ago and it stank of pure patchouli for years - LUVERLY!
I'm happy to make do with other 'earthy' aromas - I love Le labo Santal 33 with it's essence of damp stone church/moist graveyard........so bring on the massive tree I say!
Another “not an oud fan” here. Very few western perfumes contain real oud. They use a substitute synthetic. Death by synth oud & the skull drilling woody ambers is far too common. Jafar would curl his chiselled lips & aquiline nose up at them!
Saying that one of the few Ouds I’d wear is JML Velvet Rose & Oud.
Now tell us what Cruella de Ville’s favourite make up products are. Specially the lippie!
Agreed! Maybe that’s the key for us none oud fans.
Another vastly more affordable favourite of mine is Velvet Oud from NorthburN, a lifestyle shop in Northumberland. Not a dupe & smells like it has some real oud in there without knocking you out with it https://north-burn.co.uk/product/velvet-oud-eau-de-parfum-100ml/
I think Ursula the Sea Witch from The Little Mermaid is a shoo-in for a perfume tie-in too (I'm thinking some sort of enormous tuberose number, like being battered to death with a bouquet containing all the expensive flowers from the florist). Also, Ursula is in charge, she has no time for whingers and she has a plan. If I did Disney bounding (I do not, but the idea is beguiling), she'd be my choice (sweetheart neckline, heavy makeup: bring it on).
Disney Villains are definitely more interesting than the heroes (what? Another prince? Or princess? Yawn).
Oh yes she’s a cracker!!
"Hell" by Hades I would totally buy
What a riotous read! I’ll never look at Jafar the same way again.😂
Ha! Where have you BEEN? He's all kinds of appealing. Ditto Alan Rickman but that one was a given...
Really, you are the most entertaining and hilarious author I know….”bored gorilla” …”flappy hoop” …🤣🤣 ..keep them coming Ruth.🙌
Flappy hoop is a particular career high, I think.
An entertaining blog as always Ruth. As a mere stripling many moons ago, I started off with pure Patchouli oil, which always left a grubby oily mark on my neck. I still go for perfumes that have that as a base note, but both the 'oudy' JM and the Gucci perfumes sound gorgeous. I'm intrigued by the 'flappy hoop' for some unexplainable reason 🤔.
My dad was obsessed with Patchouli, happy memories x
Jo Malone Rose and Oud is gorgeous 😍
I know that proper perfume people often get sniffy about JM but honestly, the crowd-pleasers are crowd-pleasers for a reason!
Been wearing the same scent since 1988 (😱) but you have seriously Jafarred me into action😂Gotta get me some flappy hoop!
Hahahaha!
I must simply go out and buy it now! Gucci should employ you but I’d rather you this minute sit down and write a bonk buster!! This term has been missing from all the Summer Reading Lists and I want it back!! And you are the woman to do it. Also perhaps I but I’m sloth like in my Summer Laziness
I'd love to write a bonkbuster but I cringe at every single word for genitalia and so not sure what I'd do for the sex scenes...
Excellent review / fragrant tale. I’m going to have to go and rewatch Aladdin now 🤭
Can we talk about Jafar's brow gel?
It's a whole other post, isn't it?
I love your writing Ruth - can't wait for the book and now want to get the audio book too for the reaI Ruth experience ha ha!
I spent my 20's (mid 80's - mid 90's) doused in Body Shop Patchouli oil and I still yearn to find something that matches up - I'd happily wear it 'raw' (?!) again (not to everyone's - by which I mean almost anyone's taste, I know!) but still search for anything with a hint of it. I got a vintage 70's shagpile rug years ago and it stank of pure patchouli for years - LUVERLY!
I'm happy to make do with other 'earthy' aromas - I love Le labo Santal 33 with it's essence of damp stone church/moist graveyard........so bring on the massive tree I say!
Also love Santal 33 xx
Another “not an oud fan” here. Very few western perfumes contain real oud. They use a substitute synthetic. Death by synth oud & the skull drilling woody ambers is far too common. Jafar would curl his chiselled lips & aquiline nose up at them!
Saying that one of the few Ouds I’d wear is JML Velvet Rose & Oud.
Now tell us what Cruella de Ville’s favourite make up products are. Specially the lippie!
I feel the JM Ouds are distinctly non-Oudy though. As in not overpoweringly Oud.
Agreed! Maybe that’s the key for us none oud fans.
Another vastly more affordable favourite of mine is Velvet Oud from NorthburN, a lifestyle shop in Northumberland. Not a dupe & smells like it has some real oud in there without knocking you out with it https://north-burn.co.uk/product/velvet-oud-eau-de-parfum-100ml/
I love this blob! Its a perfect platform for you!!
: )
This reminded me of this post: https://thecandyperfumeboy.com/2014/04/11/scent-a-celebrity-series-poor-unfortunate-smells-scenting-disney-villains/#more-10787
Hahaha, this is amazing!! There's me, ten years later, putting Jafar in Gucci rather than Dior. It's a sign of the times.